Dear Uncle Ezra - Questions for Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Dear Mover and Shaker,

A fist-bump sounds like a great alternative to a handshake these days... as well as plenty of rest, healthy food and decreasing stress to your body that would lower your resistnace.

Uncle Ezra

Dear Uncle Erza,

I would like to remind Concerned Cornellian (Sept. 10, Q1), and the rest of the Cornell community, that hand sanitizer is already available in all restrooms on campus, cleverly called "soap".

- Wash Ed Hands

Dear All Washed Up,

Good point!

Uncle Ezra

Uncel Ezra,

My roommate is gross... like he won't even put sheets on his bed and has been using a towel for a blanket ever since we got here. He also hardly ever bathes and when he does, he steals my shampoo. What do I have to do to drop this slob?

~grossed out on west campus

Dear Grossed Out,

There is little you will be able to do to change roommates, so your best course of action is to talk to your rooommate. Sometimes a simple, non-aggressive comment will help, like, "Hey, please don't use my shampoo. I think they sell shampoo at ...."

In terms of the general cleanliness, a good conversation is necessary. You might start out saying, "Our room is starting to smell pretty gross. I'd like to talk about what we can do to keep it in better shape." You might say something about how you each have the right to individual preferences, but you would really appreciate it if he would use sheets and a blanket and wash them when necessary.

If you don't think you can do this on your own, let your RA know your predicament and they will be glad to help you figure out a way to remedy the situation.

Uncle Ezra

DUE,

How do I get a room switch? My roommate and I do not get along and I have health concerns that he ignores me about and continues to aggravate. What happens if the RHD cannot do anything? What's the average waiting time period for someone who needs to switch out if they have health reasons?

Thanks,

Dying in Dorm

Dear Dying,

Room swithes are very difficult and only done under very special circumstances. Keep working with your RA and RHD. They are very well trained and can help oert out some of the stickiest situations.

Uncle Ezra

Uncle Ezra--I NEED YOUR HELP!!

I have a friend (I'll call her Penny). Penny went to a nice high school and comes from a pretty well-off family. However, she says some slightly offensive things.

For example, when meeting new people, Penny will always tell people that her school was meant for the "elite" and "affluent" and how people who aren't part of the "upper class" aren't meant to go to good schools or have romantic relationships with people from different socioeconomic levels. She will say a lot of things that make her sound like a bigot--when she really isn't. Sometimes I feel she's really just trying to impress people in the initial conversation...when in reality she's giving people the wrong impression.

My other friends and I always have to try cover for her in conversations to smooth things out when her comments draw questionable looks.

How do we approach her about this topic, Uncle Ezra? We don't want to offend her, but it's going to be a problem if we don't take action now.

Thanks,

Your Worried Niece.

Dear Worried Niece,

It is so good to hear how you are concerned for your friend. The best way to approach her is to use "I-messages." I-messages share just what you think or assume and therefore don't blame or attact the other person. They are openers for further conversation and they always start with the word "I" and usually describe how you feel about something.

Here is an example, "I worry that others will get the wrong impression of you when you say that "people who aren't part of the 'upper class' aren't meant to go to good schools."

Or, "I noticed that Sue gave you a strange look when you said, "People from the 'upper class' shouldn't be in relationships with people below them."

Or, "I feel uncomfortable when you talk about being upper class. It might make people think you are a bigot, when I know that you aren't."

Cornell is a place where people learn, not only an amazing amount about about academics, but also learn and grow socially and emotionally from their peers. Thanks for being part of the Cornell caring community.

Uncle Ezra

Hi, Uncle Ezra, Regarding flying across the country for Christmas break (Question 8 on Sept. 10, 2009), I have two pieces of advice after several difficult trips for my daughter: 1) Fly out of Syracuse, not Ithaca. 2) Make the first stop out of Syracuse a southern-area hub airport, such as Atlanta or Dallas.

Item one is necessary because of item two. If you fly out of Ithaca, you can only reach northern airports on the first leg.

Item two is necessary to reduce weather complications, and flying into a hub gives you more options if changes do become necessary.

Weather complications are a fact of life at Christmas break all across the northern half of the country, with delays at one place cascading generally east and west. Be like the birds: go SOUTH first! And buy your tickets early.

Dear Experienced,

Thanks for the advice.

Uncle Ezra

Dear Reader,

The timing of color change and leaf fall are primarily regulated by the calendar, that is, the increasing length of night. None of the other environmental influences-temperature, rainfall, food supply, and so on-are as unvarying as the steadily increasing length of night during autumn. As days grow shorter, and nights grow longer and cooler, biochemical processes in the leaf begin to paint the landscape with nature's autumn palette.

During the growing season, chlorophyll is continually being produced and broken down and leaves appear green. As night length increases, chlorophyll production slows down and then stops and eventually all the chlorophyll is destroyed. The carotenoids and anthocyanins that are present in the leaf are then unmasked and show their colors.

Oaks turn red, brown, or russet; hickories, golden bronze; aspen and yellow-poplar, golden yellow; dogwood, purplish red; beech, light tan; and sourwood and black tupelo, crimson. Maples differ species by species-red maple turns brilliant scarlet; sugar maple, orange-red; and black maple, glowing yellow.

One thing that disturbs this beautiful show of color is the wind and rain. They can drive all those beautifully colored leaves to the ground before we have ample time to appreciate them.

Uncle Ezra

Hello Uncle Ezra. I wanted to enroll this year into the Introductory Quechua class but could not find it in the roster. Is Professor Luis Morato-Pena no longer on campus? Will he ever be back and when? I am Kichua myself but was not able to learn the language. My parents understand it, but did not know it well enough to teach me as a child.

Thank You

Dear Kichua,

The recession has hit Cornell as it has hit so many ihstitutions around the globe. A number of classes have been discontinued as Cornell tries to live within its means. Hopefully, as the economy imporves we will restore some of the lost fields of interest.

Uncle Ezra

Dear Uncle Ezra,

A friend of mine from Harvard--- yes, Harvard--- (well, now that the pain of saying that word - twice - is over, I will continue) is apparently writing an article on the freshman class at each Ivy League school. She has sought our her noble Cornellian friends from high school to name all of the celebrities/semi-famous students in this year's frosh class of 2013. The only problem is - I do not know of any and cannot find any! I did a people search of "Prince," hoping to find royalty, but to no avail. Google has failed me.

But I cannot let this happen! Brown has now acquired Emma Watson, so surely we have acquired someone noteworthy to mention in my friend's article!!!

Uncle Ezra! We cannot go down without a fight!

Here is what my Harvardian associate is looking for, specifically, in her own words (by the middle of this coming week):

"I'm writing an article on the freshman class at each Ivy League school, and I was wondering if you know of any celebrities--think anything from actual celebrities to Bush relatives to some kid who won the National Spelling Bee--in the class of 2013 at Cornell."

Godspeed, Keeping-Our-Noble-Alma-Mater-Standing

Dear Image Builder,

I really don't know, but maybe my readers do! Are any of you celebrities?

Uncle Ezra

Hi Uncle Ezra,

In response to 'Unheard pianist': another option would be to talk to some of Cornell's digital music people (e.g. Prof. Kevin Ernste); they have plenty of equipment, and most of it is located just around the corner from the practise rooms in Lincoln Hall.

Dear Reader,

Thanks for responding with another option.

Uncle Ezra

Dear Uncle Ezra,

My roommate is a great guy and we get along really well during waking hours...except there's one thing about him that bugs me: he talks in his sleep. Every night. Relentlessly.

I get woken up sometimes four or five times a night when he says random things... I tried earplugs, but it didn't help. The subject matter that he talks about is also pretty disturbing. Sometimes it's VERY sexual, or really dark and CREEPY (a few times having to do with murder and the occult???).

I'm in a tough situation. I'm afraid to bring it up to him, because I don't think he can help it and I don't want to hurt our friendship. And I also don't want to get a new roommate (we're good friends). But this sleep talking is getting intolerable. Any advice?

~Unintentional Insomniac

Dear Sleepy,

Sleep talking, or somniloquy, is not uncommon and usually not a problem for the individual. About 5% of adults do some form of sleep talking. It can be occasional for some individuals, and others chatter away through the night every night.

For some sleep talkers,underlying factors contribute to the amount of chatter, such as stress, lack of sleep, not eating enough, or heavy meals just before bedtime. If the roommate were willing to address it, they might be able to come up with solutions to help reduce the nighttime monologues. This writer shouldn't be afraid to bring it up--its most likely the roommate has already been told by others that he has a tendency to sleep talk. He doesn't need to tell his friend about his graphic language. He can be vague about what he has heard. But together, maybe they could discuss solutions.

The writer may want to suggest the following to the sleep talker

Get sufficient sleep. This may seem paradoxical, but lack of sleep causes stress in some people, which in turn, leads to sleep talking.
Try relaxation exercises, such as meditation
Try light or not eating just before going to bed
Try to maintain a regular sleep schedule
Consider cutting back on or eliminating caffeine and alcohol consumption

The talker could also consult a health care provider who might recommend a sleep specialist to take a deeper look at the concern.

Uncle Ezra

Dear Ezra,

This is probably something you do not come across much, but I thought I'd try my hand. Here is the story:

My roommate goes to Ithaca College and we are living in Cayuga Heights without a car. I have a meal plan so I can eat in the dining hall. I was curious to know if it would be possible for my roommate to get one at Cornell too for convenience sake. I know the answer is probably no, but you can't know until you ask. Also, it just seems to me that it would be in the school's best interest to offer this option to make more money, and because they should have a commitment to all students, not limited to those at their own institution as great educators.

Thanks.

Dear Enrolled Student,

That’s an interesting proposition but, no, Cornell Dining Plans are not available to non-enrolled students here. As for “making more money” with billions more served, Cornell Dining is not intended to make a profit. Cornell Dining exists to provide the best possible food to our students at the most affordable price. I’m sure the chow is (almost) as good at IC.

Uncle Ezra