Dear Niece or Nephew,

Today "Dear Uncle Ezra" and his helpers work to answer as many of your questions as possible, but we don't have time to get to every question. Some questions are answered only by email to those who give their email address.  Some never get answered because we can't find anyone to help with the answer in a reasonable amount of time.  And many are not answered because they are similar to a question asked in the past few months. Remember to search the archives for past answers that might be helpful to you or even better, email or call the office on campus directly for your answer.

Ezra has a few regular helpers who do research and craft answers. There are the many staff members throughout the university who respond to pleas for help with answers as well.

"Dear Uncle Ezra" was the first on-line helpline in the world. One of the first queries, in the fall of 1986, was from a dining worker who was diagnosed with AIDS. As a very responsive communication service in a world increasingly filled with layers of bureaucracy before one can find a live, warm human being, Ezra has been able to help students, staff, alumni, prospective students, parents -- readers all around the world -- calm their fears, consider courses of action, determine resources, feel heard and feel empowered.

DEAR UNCLE EZRA will take a well deserved break next week and enjoy Thanksgiving with family and friends.  If you are on campus for break please make a reservation to enjoy a wonderful feast with others at Cornell.  This is a great place to meet others who are here for the weekend so you can plan to get together.

THANKSGIVING FEAST!!!!

The on-campus Thanksgiving Feast is scheduled for Thanksgiving Day, Thursday November 24 at Robert Purcell Marketplace Eatery. There are two seatings available: 12:00pm and 1:30pm. Tickets are $12 for adults; $8.00 for children 6-12 years old; FREE for children 5 & younger.

Tickets go on sale beginning November 14 and can be purchased at the following locations: Hasbrouck and Maplewood Service Centers; Holland International Living Center (M, W, Fri 10 am–2 pm, Th 1 pm–4 pm, until November 18, only); Willard Straight Hall Ticket Office; Big Red Barn ( M–Th 2 pm–10 pm, through November 21, only); International Students and Scholars Office (B50 Caldwell Hall).

Be warned: This is a really popular dinner event and it has been known to sell out, so get your tickets early. Tickets will NOT be available at the door.

After your dinner, you’ll probably want to relax for a while. According to the Libraries website, libraries are closed on Thursday and Friday during Thanksgiving break. It looks like a couple of libraries might have Saturday hours and many are open on Sunday. Here’s the link: http://www.library.cornell.edu/FallBreaks2011. Have a restful break.

Uncle Ezra   

Dear Healthy Individual,

How refreshing to hear of your ability to follow your passions and interests.  I celebrate those who do what is right for them whether it fits into the mainstream or not.  You are on a path to fulfillment and happiness as you step to the beat of your own drummer.  Now the trick is to find others as passionate about similar things or passionate about other "weird" endeavors.

There are many clubs and organizations on campus dedicated to your interests, for example The Art Club based in Willard Straight Hall or Cornell Outdoor Education or The Gaming Club or others that I haven't heard of.  Check out the list on the Student Activities website, https://sao.cornell.edu/SO/. 

Another way to connect with others of your ilk would be in your choice of living situation for next year.  Sounds like you would be a great asset to Risley Hall or maybe Ecology House.  You might also check out some of the Co-ops on campus.  They are groups of like-minded individuals looking for a cooperative living situation that is different from a fraternity.

You are not alone.  140 students actually met last week to talk at "Dining With Diverse Leaders" about increasing the number of non-alcoholic ways for students to congregate, meet each other and enjoy high energy events.  Look for more exciting programming in the next semester.

Good luck.   There is something for everyone at Cornell you just have to look for it!

Uncle Ezra   

Dear Student,

Please go to Gannett Health Center and let them know of your continuous illness.  They may be able to help you find out whether there is an underlying cause that needs to be addressed. 

It also would be beneficial to meet with an advisor in the Student Services and Academic Advising Office of your college to let them know of your condition to see what recommendations they have for someone who has had to miss so many classes due to illness.  Don't continue to deal with this on your own.  There are many wise people on campus who can work with you to find the best solution to your dilemma.

Uncle Ezra   

Dear Depressed,

Yes, there is a program set up just for people who express your concerns.  It is called Let's Talk.

"Let's Talk" is a program that provides easy access to informal confidential consultations with counselors from Gannett Health Services. Counselors hold walk-in hours at sites around campus Monday through Friday. 

Speaking with a counselor can help provide insight, solutions, and information about other resources.

Learn more about Let's Talk and the difference between "Let's Talk" and (traditional) counseling before coming to one of our campus locations.

These consultations are offered for you: take advantage them!
Let's Talk consultations are:

• free
• confidential
• no appointment necessary

Uncle Ezra   

Dear Earth-Lover,

You bring up some interesting points in your question! After speaking to a representative at Cornell's sustainability office I came to understand that the university does not actually have a formal policy of switching off lights before a building is locked; if someone forgets to switch a light off, it stays on until the next morning.

Cornell Energy Conservation is making an effort to install motion sensors that will automatically indicate when a person is within a certain vicinity, and as a result to turn on the light. These detectors are commonly used in bathrooms such as those located in Statler Hall. Phillips Hall is piloting a new technology called Wireless Occupancy Servers and Switching. This technology serves a similar purpose to the motion detectors.

Uncle Ezra   

Dear Desperate,

I checked with Student and Academic Services’ Facilities office, and was told that they do indeed have bed boards for students who prefer a firmer mattress. You may request a bed board by going to housing.cornell.edu and clicking “Place a Maintenance Request.”

Uncle Ezra   

Dear Marguerite,

Here are a few leads. There was once a program called Eliza, the most simple and archaic attempt to produce empathic responses from a computer.  Then there was, yours truly, Dear Uncle Ezra, which has advanced a bit over the years, but is still an unbelievably slow response compared to the rapid response from google searches. There is Columbia University's "Ask Alice"  for all health concerns.  Cornell's faq online is an answer service for LGBT questions.  Siri is a voice activated personal assistant built into an iPhone. And I have heard about a new program called Spill, which is an attempt to provide online counseling. 

Hope that helps. I am sure there are more programs out there.  I would love a copy of your research when you have completed it.

Uncle Ezra   

Dear Wanting to be Social,

What a wonderful letter!  You have great insight into your situation and seem ready to start connecting with people.  And, yes, it will only happen if you take the initiative.  Ready, set, go!

Here is my advice:  Join one of these three groups to help you get started on fulfilling relationships.

EARS (Empathy Assistance and Referral Service). Sign up for training in communication skills, http://ears.dos.cornell.edu/training.html#whoisinvited:

Who is invited?
Any member of the Cornell Community who wants to:
• become a better listener
• gain personal life skills
• prepare to become a counselor
• meet people from across the campus
• build your resume

What will I learn?
• Empathic listening
• Non-judgmental communication
• Counseling micro-skills
• Ways to enhance relationships
• Leadership practices
• Greater self-understanding and compassion
• More appreciation for others
• In-depth skills for real-life situations

Cornell Minds Matter is another great organization on campus that runs billions of events, educational and social, to get to know people, start conversations and find balance as a student at Cornell.  Go to their General body Meetings in the espring term in the 5th floor lounge of Willard Straight Hall on Tuesdays from 4:30 - 5:30 starting the second week of classes.

Or join one of their small groups, like Writing Through the Rough Spots. You can sign up for this on their website: http://mindsmatter.dos.cornell.edu/index.html.

The third idea is to join Toastmasters.  Experienced professionals and beginning speakers alike can benefit from our practical, face-to-face learning program. Whether you're speaking to the board of directors, your customers, your co-workers or your kids, Toastmasters can help you do it better. You'll learn and practice in a friendly, comfortable environment with people who are there for the same reason you are—to become better communicators.

At Toastmasters, members learn by speaking to groups and working with others in a supportive environment. A typical Toastmasters club is made up of 20 to 30 people who meet once a week for about an hour. Each meeting gives everyone an opportunity to practice conducting meetings, giving impromptu speeches, presenting prepared speeches, and offering constructive evaluation. http://cayuga.freetoasthost.us/index.html.

Uncle Ezra   

Dear Reader,

Variations of these symbols representing each college appear on stone shields at the Willard Straight Hall entrance and on the banners hanging in the Memorial Room. The eight shields at the entrance represent (from left to right) Architecture, Engineering, Law, Graduate School, Arts & Sciences, Medicine, Agriculture, and Veterinary Medicine

The banners inside, replaced in 2009 by the Sigma Phi Society (http://www.news.cornell.edu/stories/Sept09/CollegeBanners.html), represent thirteen colleges, adding Hotel Administration, Industrial & Labor Relations, Human Ecology, Johnson Graduate School of Management, and Weill Cornell Medical College in Qatar. A small placard in the room indicates which banners represent each college.

These college symbols can also be seen at Commencement each year, carried on banners in front of each college's group of graduates.

Uncle Ezra   

Dear Class of ?,
It is up to you!  The university will interpret your class year as the actual year your degree is from, so if you graduate in May 2013 they would consider you class of '13.  But that doesn't mean you can't stay connected to the class you are most loyal too.  In your case if you really feel you are class of 2014 at heart, when you graduate you can choose to affiliate with the class of 2014, so you're on their mailing list for reunions and other class events.

Uncle Ezra   

Dear Fishindistress,

According to the terms and conditions of your housing contract, you are permitted to have “fish that are in tanks no larger than 10 gallons.” The terms and conditions do not specify how many fish you may have, nor how many tanks. So you are perfectly within your rights to get a second tank for your betta fish, as long as that tank is no larger than 10 gallons.

Uncle Ezra