Dear Confused Nephew,
Professor James Aist in Plant Sciences runs a project called "Alternative to Homosexuality Anonymous".  I'm not sure whether or not he's pushing a fundamentalist viewpoint per se, but you can contact him for more information if you'd like (jra2@Cornell.edu; 255-7874). Since many people are skeptical about his group's claims, I also strongly suggest that you contact/visit some of the other resources on campus for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgendered (LGBT) students.
        I shared your letter with Susan Overton, Coordinator of Haven (the LGBT Peer Counseling Program), who says that in her experience, most LGBT students are looking for acceptance of their sexuality from friends and family members, rather than a way to change their sexual orientation.  She notes:  "For most LGBT folks, 'coming out' is a great relief at not having to hide a part of themselves that is essential to their personal well-being.  And most LGBT folks come to understand that the problem is not with them and their sexual orientation, but with a society that is afraid of people who love people and have intimate relationships with people of the same gender.  Most LGBT people need a place or group or other individual in their lives who support them unconditionally, and want them -- if that is what they choose for themselves -- to pursue a fulfilling life which embraces a non-heterosexual sexuality.  I believe that attempts to 'convert' LGBT folks really encourage them to suppress their sexuality and lead unhappy lives."
        Thanks, Susan!  If you'd like to talk with Susan about her response, you can reach her at 255-3869 or at sco2@Cornell.edu.  Or you can call with a peer counselor at Haven:  255-7337.

Uncle Ezra   

Dear Concerned,
There's nothing at all stupid about testing out a major that sounded good to you, though I know it's frustrating to get part way into something only to discover you don't like it as much as you thought you would.  But you're not wasting your parents' money by taking the time you need to figure out your major.  With your overall good grades, the worst that can happen is that you find out engineering isn't the best fit and you move on to something more suited to your skills and interests.  The courses you take now will transfer to other programs, at least as free electives and in many cases as distribution requirements.
        There are three places you can go for general help deciding about your major and career direction:  1) To Vivian Geller, Director of the Internal Transfer Division (ITD), who helps students transition from one of Cornell's colleges to another and students who feel they want a change in their academic direction but don't know the shape of it yet.  You can make an appointment with Vivian by calling 255-4386 or stopping by 220 Day Hall.  2)  To the University Career Center (103 Barnes Hall; 255-5221), which has one of the most extensive libraries of career information in the country plus counseling and testing to help assess your interests and explore options.  3)  To gather information (through brochures or conversations) at the admissions offices of colleges besides the Engineering School (such as the College of Agriculture and Life Sciences, the College of Human Ecology, and the College of Architecture, Art, and Planning).  These admissions offices are listed under their respective colleges in the campus phone directory.
        Of course there are thousands of things you can do with your hands and/or outdoors -- from veterinary medicine to sculpting to agricultural research -- and the trick is to get an academic base that will launch you into the areas in which you have the most interest at the moment.  Odd as it may seem when you're striving for an undergraduate degree, many people wind up in work only remotely related to their undergraduate work, either because of further degrees, on-the-job training, or weird quirks of circumstance.  If you follow the trail of what you most enjoy now, you'll set a precedent for enjoying the future as well.
        It's neat that you're thinking about firefighting, which of course can be a volunteer or a professional occupation.  The Ithaca Fire Department's Volunteer Coordinator, Marcia Lynch, will be happy to talk with you about opportunities to consider.  You can call her at 272-1234.
        You sound very sensitive to the impact that the cost of Cornell is having on your family.  That can put a lot of strain on you, too, especially if you're feeling guilty or embarrassed about the very natural difficulty of finding your direction.  If you want to talk with someone in more detail about family dynamics -- including what's in your power to change and what isn't -- you can call or visit one of the counseling resources listed on the main "Dear Uncle Ezra" menu
under Ezra Pointer to Personal Counseling Services.  Although the folks at these services will gladly see students in severe crises, they're also there to help students with more "everyday" adjustments to college, including changes in family relationships.
        You're more than welcome for this information.  Please let me know if there's any further way I can help.

Uncle Ezra   

Dear Dubious,
I forwarded your letter to Professor German (gag5@Cornell.edu), who replies:  "First of all, I'm disappointed that anyone would be surprised that I was in the Basketball Hall of Fame -- given my reputation from noon hour hoops in Barton.  However, it's true:  I am a 'member' of the Basketball Hall of Fame, and you too can become a member, by just sending in your money to support the Hall of Fame. It's true that I was never inducted into the Hall of Fame, in spite of my court powers and my role as captain of the Lakeview High b-ball team (3 - 14) during my senior year.  My affiliation with the Hall of Fame resulted when my son-in-law became associate director of the 'Hall' several years ago and put pressure on me to join (i.e., pay some fee for reduced admission price and discounts at the Hall of Fame Store and the chance to receive a newsletter four times a year!).  I also received a neat poster which is on display in my office...which a student must have seen and started this rumor.  So, that's the story!"
        Thanks (and many happy hoops to you), Professor German!

Uncle Ezra   

Dear Engaged Niece,
I'm happy for you!  A Justice of the Peace, a judge, or a mayor can perform your wedding ceremony just about anywhere you'd like (within reason...for instance, they might hesitate to do a scuba wedding under Cayuga Lake!).  Depending on the weather and time of year, you can have the ceremony and reception together:  For example, on the Manhattan (out of Old Port Harbor); in the Founders Room at Anabel Taylor (for a small ceremony of about 50 people); the Johnson Art Museum; the Miller Heller House on Eddy Street; the Rose Inn; the Benn Conger Inn; the Andrew Dickson White House; one of the many wineries like Wagners or Knapps; or at an outdoor place that's special to you two, like a park or the Plantations.  Or you can have the reception at the the Fountainebleau Inn in Alpine, with the ceremony at the lovely old stone church next door (which does not require a religious ceremony).  What's most important is that you pick a place that fits your personalities.
        Carolyn Taber (cet4@Cornell.edu; 255-6007; 123 Anabel Taylor Hall), Building Coordinator at Anabel Taylor, has details about these and other possibilities.  She can also help you book places on campus.
        Have a delightful time planning!  You're very welcome for the advice...I'm always encouraged to hear that a reply meant for one person helps others, as well.

Uncle Ezra   

Dear Taylor,
According to Barbara Skoblick at CIT (BS10@Cornell.edu), the newer versions of Netscape support POP mail.  You need to configure Netscape to read and send mail.  Under the options menu, there's a "mail and news preferences" selection.  You need to identify the servers.  Outgoing mail should be cornell.edu; incoming should be whatever postoffice server you're using (you can check your Eudora configuration for details); and the POP account should be your netid. If you have any problems, you can call the CIT HelpDesk (255-8990) for further assistance.
        Thanks, Barbara!

Uncle Ezra